Palin's Enemies List

Palin and Her Enemies
A New York Times column by Ross Douthat

I have no doubt my friend Bob will be as disappointed as anyone that The Bob Rule remains in effect. As Bob told me twenty odd years ago: to be a successful politician, you have to have only one thing, and that’s absolutely no sense of self-consciousness or embarrassment. 

Ms. Jayne Mansfield. You don't want to
know how much time I spent agonizing
over which picture of Ms. Mansfield I
would use to lead this article.

For example, during Clinton administration, notoriously successful politician Senator Orrin Hatch spent all his time and efforts trying to block every single appointment to the federal bench. Then, George W. Bush becomes President, and nominates a series judicial candidates that are flatly unqualified. When members of the Judiciary Committee start to take issue with some (but not all) of these nominees, Senator Hatch rents his garments at the unfairness of it all. How DARE anyone block these poor candidates from getting a vote on the Senate floor? And nary a blush touches the Senator’s cheek through all the wailing and gnashing of teeth.

The Politics of Poopy Heads

A reoccurring theme in Governor Palin’s both spoken and written apologia as to why she is unable to govern was the “politics of personal destruction.” Governor Palin’s career was destroyed by “political operatives” (cue the theme from Mission: Impossible!) who kept filing frivolous ethics complaints against her. Answering those complaints took up all the Governor’s time and money. Not to mention, it was just plain low down and mean.

NY Times conservative columnist Ross Douthat put it this way in his July 6 2006 column: 

Here are the lessons of the Sarah Palin experience, for any aspiring politician who shares her background and her sex. Your children will go through the tabloid ringer. Your religion will be mocked and misrepresented. Your political record will be distorted, to better parody your family and your faith. And a moron says what.

Mr. Ross Douthat. We are unable to
confirm nor deny whether the quote
"Damn it, Samsara Samizdat...stop 
writing about me...!" attributed to Mr.
Douthat, is genuine.

So I made up that last part. But come on--has Mr. Douthat been living in solitary confinement in a North Korean prison since 1988? What on earth has been said to or about Governor Palin (or her children) that even comes close to the vitriol and scorn poured on Hillary Clinton’s head? I don’t watch much television, but I’m pretty sure I’d have heard about it if someone had called one of the Palin daughters “the Juneau Statehouse Dog.” 

Has there been a considerable effort to accuse Governor Palin of murder, following the suicide of one of her friends, as happened to Secretary Clinton, following the death of Vince Foster? 

Has Sarah Palin had to spend years defending against truly frivolous actions, the likes of Whitewater, “Filegate” (over misplaced files in the White House), or “Travelgate” (the firing of the White House travel agents)? 

Have the “liberal bloggers” Governor Palin complains of launched a wholly frivolous lawsuit, as a naked, personal attack on her and the Governor’s office, as did the individuals behind Paula Jones’s suit against President Clinton?

Has Sarah Palin had to face an “independent” counsel like Ken Starr, who wrote a “report” about sexual acts between consenting adults, pointedly including details that were irrelevant to any ethical or legal violations, but were included solely to embarrass President Clinton?

Is there anyone, with any kind of platform, that has said about Governor Palin what Michael Savage has said about Secretary Hillary Clinton? (Admittedly, I try to be that mean—but poser that I am, I’m just not in Mr. Savage’s league).

Did anyone at a rally for President Obama yell that Governor Palin was a “terrorist,” and that someone should “kill” her? At one rally, it was Senator McCain—and not Governor Palin—who finally stood up and said that then Senator Obama was a “good American,” and not some fifth columnist for a totalitarian Islamic theocracy. 

No, all the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune suffered by Governor Palin are not anything unusual (or even undeserved), and she has no business complaining about it.

Will the Real Sara Palin, Please Stand Up!

Ms. Anita Eckberg, demonstrating the
safe way to use a ladder while wearing
heels. Always good to know.

In his column, Mr. Douthat says “[i]f Palin were exactly what her critics believe she is—the distillation of every right-wing pathology, from anti-intellectualism to apocalyptic Christianity—then she wouldn’t be a terribly interesting figure. But this caricature has always missed the point of the Alaska governor’s appeal—one that extends well outside the Republican Party’s shrinking base.”

Critic that I am, OF COURSE I think Governor Palin is the distillation of every right-wing pathology, from anti-intellectualism to apocalyptic Christianity. But why do I think that? Because I’ve been paying attention to what Governor Palin says, that’s why. Maybe Mr. Douthat has some reason to suspect Governor Palin is lying when she says she is a fundamentalist Christian who believes her version of the Bible (in English) is the literal, infallible word of god (sic), that the world will end in cataclysmic fire on the Last Days, and that she believes in the Rapture, with Heaven for those who accept Jesus of Nazareth as the son of god and their personal savior, and Hell for everyone who doesn’t. I don’t know--she sounds sincere to me. Maybe she is just pretending--but I doubt it.

Yeah, I think that Governor Palin is “anti-intellectual,” and I would describe myself as “intellectual.” Admittedly, I am one snotty guy (and not just the booger kind). I actually own copies of Richard Hofstader’s Anti-Intellectualism in American Life;Dumbing Down, Essays on the Strip Mining of American Culture; Milovan Djilas’s The New Class, and a set of the pre-revised Great Books of the Western World. Ya feel me? (So I watch “The Wire.” See “poser,” supra). 

When I say “Sarah Palin is an anti-intellectual,” this is what I mean: Governor Palin has a shallow grasp of politics, history, and culture. She is proud of that fact, and believes that having a broad grasp of those issues is a disadvantage, usually because people who have such knowledge risk losing their common sense. Why do I think that about Sarah Palin? Well, just because she doesn’t SAY nattering nabobs of negativism, you just know (in her heart) that’s what she means when she attacks the Unrepresentative Eastern Liberal Elitist Media Establishment (the UELEME).

Again, I am not the only person who thinks so. The Washington Post’s Anne Applebaum felt compelled to respond to Governor Palin’s July 4 2009 broadsideagainst the “main stream” (Palin’s phase) media. After noting that Governor Palin accuses “Washington and the Media” of being unable to understand her (Governor Palin’s) decision to resign, because “it’s about country,” Ms. Applebaum says

In other words, for the past nine months, Palin has avoided difficult questions, preferring Runner's World to another Katie Couric interview; she has dragged her family into the spotlight when it suited her (baby Trig was in Runner's World, too) and grown angry when the spotlight became too strong; she has eschewed reason and logic (not to mention spelling and grammar), yet reacted in horror when her critics were unreasonable and illogical in response. Then, after all that, she smugly asserts the right to decide who is a patriot and who is not. It's not about "country," in other words, it's about hypocrisy. And Sarah Palin is full of it.

Ms. Jane Russell. Howard Hughes may not have known about some things, but one thing he did know about was where to put the gun in movie posters.

Let’s just say that reasonable minds may differ to the extent my own responses to Governor Palin are “illogical" and/or "unreasonable,” but no one can deny Governor Palin couldn’t name then (and has not since) a single source of where she gets her “news,” she has refused to be interviewed by anyone not named Sean Hannity (or the equivalent thereof), and her statement explaining her resignation reads like it was written by a below average high school student. More importantly, the fact that Governor Palin is troubled by none of these things, that puts her firmly in the anti-intellectualism camp.

Forget Annette Funicello. Who All is in the Sarah Palin Fan Club?

Mr. Douthat cites a Pew poll, finding that 46 percent of “independents” and 48 percent of Americans without a college education have a favorable impression of Governor Palin. Mr. Douthat’s point is

Palin’s popularity has as much to do with class as it does with ideology. In this sense, she really is the perfect foil for Barack Obama. Our president represents the meritocratic ideal[:] that anyone, from any background, can grow up to attend Columbia and Harvard Law School and become the great American success story. But Sarah Palin represents the democratic ideal[:] that anyone can grow up to be a great success story without graduating from Columbia and Harvard . . . [S]he’s an essential democratic role[:] the ordinary citizen who takes on the elites, the up-by-your-bootstraps role embodied by politicians from Andrew Jackson to Harry Truman.

Ms. Anita Eckberg, perhaps in a
dramatization of what happens to 
Alaskan politicians who fail to properly
report gifts of residential construction.
Please note I said "perhaps," because
I just can't be sure.

No, Sarah Palin is not a Harry Truman or an Andrew Jackson, using bootstraps to pull herself up. Here’s the crucial difference: those people are able to show that they are just as good, just as smart, and just as capable as the “meritocratic elites,” despite not attending Harvard Law School or Columbia. For example, Supreme Court Justice Hugo Black represents the “democratic ideal” Mr. Douthat alludes to. Love him or hate him, Justice Black certainly knew his onions. But he took the hard way to get to the Supreme Court. At age 17, without a high school diploma or a college education, he enrolled in University of Alabama School of Law. Prior to his appointment to the Supreme Court, his only judicial experience was in 1911, when he was a “police court” judge for a year. But if you ever asked Justice Black what he read, he would not have said “let me get back to you about that.” Justice Black—and not Sarah Palin—represents what is best about social mobility in America.

I mentioned earlier that I am a snob, that I am an elitist. That means when I needed surgery, the fact a particular surgeon may have had a favorable approval rating with 48 percent of Americans without a college education, that meant less than nothing to me. I wanted a surgeon who had a favorable approval rating with people who knew about the surgery I needed. Why should I be any less demanding (and snobby) about the caliber of my political leadership? 

Ms. Jayne Mansfield. This was my other
choice for lead photo. In some ways,
it's a nicer photo, but the other picture
just felt more Jayne Mansfieldy to me.

Right, now, we are facing the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression. On the one hand, we have Sarah Palin, armed with platitudes like “[e]nergy independence and national security, fiscal restraint, smaller government, and local control have been my priorities and will remain my priorities.” On the other hand, there is Paul Krugman, who writes a column for the NY Times. He’s also a professor of economics and international affairs at Princeton University, and won the 2008 Nobel Prize for economics. He says we need more stimulus ie lots more government spending. 

Now, just because Paul Krugman has the kind of “big fat resume” that Governor Palin was dismissive of after she was named the 2008 GOP vice presidential candidate, does that mean Paul is right and Sarah is wrong? Of course not. For example, one of America’s greatest physicists was William Shockley, who won the Nobel Prize for his invention of the transistor. Dr. Shockley, who died in 1989, was also (arguably) a committed racist. So, for questions about electrons and holes in semiconductors, Dr. Shockley has my attention. But for questions about eugenics—no, he is not The Man.

Still, not all opinions are created equal, nor do they all deserve equal consideration. Looking at both Dr. Krugman and Governor Palin, I am persuaded by Dr. Krugman. As for the fact that almost half of the population without a college education find Governor Palin’s economic analysis more persuasive, for me that is a cause of concern about America's non- college educated. That fact alone, however, does not give any credence to Governor Palin’s opinions.

Can’t We All Just Get Along?

No, we just can’t. 

One of the themes of Mr. Douthat’s article is that while Governor Palin certainly shot herself in the foot numerous times, the elititists still treated her unfairly, because of her gender and social class.

Not a pusillanimous pussyfooter.

No we didn’t (What? Samsara Samizdat may originate from Oregon, but it is still part of the Unrepresentative Eastern Liberal Elitist Media Establishment (the UELEME). This blog is filled withhopeless, hysterical hypochondriacs of history. Moreover, I can be just as much a pusillanimous pussyfooter as anyone. And since it began in 2007, there has been over (kind of) 400 hits. That counts. IT COUNTS!).

In 1970, Nebraska Senator Roman Hruska carved his niche in history, when on the Senate floor, he defended President Nixon’s nomination to the Supreme Court of notoriously mediocre G. Harrold Carswell, by declaring “[e]ven if he is mediocre, there are a lot of mediocre judges and people and lawyers. They are entitled to a little representation, aren't they, and a little chance? We can't have all Brandeises, Frankfurters and Cardozos.” 

Sorry--but no: the mediocrities do not deserve even a little chance. And yes, weshould aspire to have all Brandeises and Cardozos. More importantly, the press has the responsibility to point out who is mediocre and who is Benjamin Cardozo, and not mince words.

Ms. Jayne Mansfield. Pictures of women
sitting on diving boards appeal to me.
I'm just weird that way.

If you think you’re qualified to be vice president (if not president), then either learn how to write a coherent sentence--or don’t whine about the people with the bad manners to point out that you can’t. As EJ Dionne said, “I understand that the standard rules of journalism require an on-the-one-hand-on-the- other-hand treatment of this event by way of finding some potential silver lining in all this for Palin. But I honestly believe there is no on-the-other-hand here.” He then goes on to quote some of the more nonsensical excerpts from Governor Palin’s press release. But what else should he do? Pretend not to notice Governor Palin’s inability to write? Or make up some “on the other hand” justification for Governor Palin’s behavior, because she is too incompetent to do so for herself? 

How on earth can Governor Palin claim to have been mistreated (absent The Bob Rule about not being embarrassed by anything)? In her statement, Governor Palin insists “[e]very one – all 15 of the ethics complaints have been dismissed. We’ve won!” No, she didn’t “win” every one of the complaints. She is just wrong. At a minimum, Governor Palin has had to reimburse the State for some of her children’s travel expenses. Additionally, the state legislature concluded that Governor Palin did in fact abuse her powers, when she tried to get her ex-brother in law (the state trooper) fired. But who else besides Samsara Samizdat has had the bad manners to point that out?

Ms. Jane Russell. This was the famous 
picture I was looking for earlier. For
me, part of Ms. Russell's appeal is her
ability to look good--no matter how
idiotic the setting.

What would have happened to Dwight Eisenhower, if in 1958 he had written:

[I]t may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: "Sit down and shut up”, but that’s the worthless, easy path; that’s a quiter’s way out. And a problem in out country today is apathy. It would be apathetic to just hunker down and "go with the flow".

I’m not sure whether the responses would have been illogical and unreasonable, but you better believe they would have been pointed.

Eugene Robinson is absolutely correct when he takes Governor Palin to task for her assertion that “And (sic) though it's honorable for countless others to leave their positions for a higher calling and without finishing a term, of course we know by now, for some reason a different standard applies for the decisions I make.” Mr. Robinson asks:

"What is she talking about? Who are these "countless others" who supposedly have made the same decision to abandon governorships for no credible reason? The names don't come rushing to mind. Why is any criticism of Poor Little Sarah the result of the "different standard" that mean old "Washington and the media" always apply? Because blaming her favorite alleged persecutors allows her to ignore the bewildered reaction from her constituents in Alaska who are stunned and mystified at her decision to skip out."

More to the point, it is intellectually dishonest for “Washington and the media” to notreport that following her resignation, Governor Palin is either delusional or deliberately talking nonsense to hide something….like maybe (for instance) she just plain lacks the ability and wherewithal to be a Governor of even a small state. 

Or maybe (I'm just saying) Governor Palin is trying to dodge a civil (as opposed to criminal) investigation by the IRS (as opposed to the Department of Justice) that some or all of her 34,500 square foot house that was ostensively built by her fisherman husband and a few of his buddies was in fact given to her by some of the contractors who were awarded bids for construction of the Wasilla Sports Complex and the Palins “forgot” to include the gift as income on their income tax return or report it as a contribution which then Mayor Palin may have been required to do so by state and/or federal law.

Ms. Anita Eckberg. "Damn it! I WARNED you to stop asking me who paid for my house!"

Not that I’m re-publishing defamation or propagating defamatory material without answering to it in a court of law or being responsible for the abuse of my right to free speech under the Alaska Constitution or continuing to publish falsehoods of criminal activity that is reckless, done without any regard for the truth, and is actionable or anything……….

I’m just asking here: who built and paid for the Palins' Wasilla home?

Money for Nothing, and The Houses are Free!

Ms. Mamie Van Doren. As they say in the mystery stories: If you're building a house, you're going to want someone like her in the floor plans......

Yesterday, I wrote a long hissy fit about Governor Palin’s resignation and the allegations that she failed to disclose that she received for free some portion of the goods and services involved in building her Wasilla home. I had mentioned that Governor Palin’s attorney, Thomas Van Flein, had sent out a press release, supposedly addressing these allegations. The press release also included a ridiculous threat of legal action against anyone who “re-publishes (sic) the defamation.” Of course, I sprained both my ankles, diving for my computer to re-publish the defamation, because if there’s anything I love more than re-publishing defamation about Sarah Palin, I’m not aware of it.

What I did not have at the time was the complete text of Mr. Van Flein’s press release, so I made snarky comments on parts of the release that were quoted in the Associated Press article reporting the story.

Ms. Yvonne Craig. She was also Bat
Girl, but in an article dissecting lawyer-
speak in press releases, you really 
need to pull out all the stops.

Well, a close personal friend sent me a link to the complete release. Unfortunately for my friend (and everyone else), I now feel morally obligated to make snarky comments about the entire release (once again illustrating that old adage about no good deed goes unpunished). So here it is, courtesy of my newest close personal friend atThe Immoral Minority.

For those of you who don’t want to read all my snarky comments (which is pretty much everyone who does more than just look at the pictures), here is the bottom line. Either Governor Palin has a terrible lawyer who does not know how to write a press release (which I can’t imagine is the case), or there is some fire in all this smoke. Do I have any reason to think that the Palins’ personal house was illegally built with public funds? From what I have seen, no. Does it look like the Palins received some undisclosed benefits from the contractors who built the Wasilla Sports Complex? To me, there are just too many unanswered questions that are easy to answer. In my less than humble opinion, Mr. Van Flein’s statement is carefully written to answer all the questions people aren’t asking, and to carefully ignore all the questions Alaskans deserve answers to.

What follows is the text of Mr. Van Flein’s press release in italic and my snarky comments in bold. Afterwards, I have drafted a statement of the type I expect to see from the Palins. My sample release involves the remodel of my house, assuming I was facing the same type of accusations.

Ms. Carroll Baker. I can't be sure, but I
think she also played the Mexican girl
in Giant.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

July 4, 2009

On July 3rd, 2009, Governor Sarah Palin announced her intent to resign her gubernatorial duties and transfer the powers of Governor to Lt. Governor Sean Parnell.

Almost immediately afterwards, several unscrupulous people have asserted false and defamatory allegations that the "real" reasons for Governor Palin’s resignation stem from an alleged criminal investigation pertaining to the construction of the Wasilla Sports Complex. 

Investigations are not always “criminal.” Ethical complaints are usually “civil” as opposed to “criminal.” Any time I see any response to an allegation of wrongdoing that emphasizes “criminal,” that is a cause for concern.

This canard was first floated by Democrat operatives in September 2008 during the national campaign and followed up by sympathetic Democratic writers.1. 

I am guessing the “1” refers to a footnote, but my source for this statement did not include the footnote.

It was easily rebutted then as one of many fabrications about Sarah Palin. Just as power abhors a vacuum, modern journalism apparently abhors any type of due diligence and fact checking before scurrilous allegations are repeated as fact.

The history of the Wasilla Sports Complex is publicly known. Contrary to the insinuation that as Mayor of Wasilla, Sarah Palin "personally" oversaw bidding, construction, funding and accounting for the project (and thus, the allegation goes, "embezzled" from the project), 

“Embezzlement” is a specific type of theft, with a very narrow meaning. Traditionally, “theft” was defined as taking the property of another, with the intent to permanently deprive the owner of that property. “Embezzlement” was taking the property of another, with the intent to temporarily deprive the owner of the property. For example, say a bank teller pulled $100 out of the cash drawer, to bet on a horse race. After the race, the teller intended to pay back the money out of the winnings. That would be “embezzlement,” as opposed to “theft.”

Later, the definition of “embezzlement” shifted again, this time to mean knowingly taking funds directly from an entity. For example, Spenard Builders Supply (SBS) was the company that supplied building materials to both the Wasilla Sports Complex, and the Palins’ home. The Palins would be guilty of “embezzling from the project,” if SBS gave the Palins building materials for free (or at a discount), charged the cost of those materials to Wasilla or the State, and the Palins were aware that SBS was taking that action. That means under either of the following two scenarios, the Palins would not be guilty of “embezzling from the project:”

1) SBS gave the Palins free (or discounted) building materials, billed the State for the cost of those materials, but the Palins were not aware that SBS was doing so; or

2) SBA gave the Palins free (or discounted) building materials, but did not bill the State for the cost of those materials.

Ms. Jayne Mansfield. I am always
surprised at the vitriol that critics
throw her way, if only attacking her
for being "fat." She knew how to work
a system that was rigged against her
every way imaginable.

In short, it is certainly possible that SBS (or any of the other contractors of the Wasilla Sports Complex) could have given the Palins a free home (or paid for some portion of goods and services), and the Palins would still not have “embezzled from the project.”

the truth is far more mundane, and publicly available:

Curtis D. Menard was instrumental in spearheading the effort from conception to realization of the Wasilla Sports Complex. He directed the steering committee that was responsible for placing the issue before the voters of Wasilla and subsequently passed. He remained chairman of that committee through the design and construction of the facility. He was an ardent supporter and leader of civic, educational and athletic endeavors within the community as well as an advocate of the continued success of the Sports Center.

http://www.cityofwasilla.com/... Thus, as any basic fact checker would learn, the Mayor of Wasilla is not listed as "chair" of the Steering Committee. As Mayor, Governor Palin did appoint the committee, another fact readily verifiable, and she was publicly on record supporting the need for such a facility—as was most of Wasilla. "Wasilla weighs sports facility" published December 6, 2001 and available athttp://www.adn.com/...While her public support of this project was deemed pivotal by many, the actual construction, bidding, financing and other day-to-day management of the project was not in her scope of authority as Mayor.

So then Mayor Palin played no role in the selection of any of the contractors or subcontractors for the Sports Complex? That was not the impression I was given in reading the history of how the Complex was built. But even if she had no role, that does not preclude the fact that she may have received free stuff from SBS or any other contractor.

Ms. Gloria Grahme. I am going to have
to keep looking, because I can't find a
picture that really does her justice. She 
was the only thing I liked in the film 
The Greatest Show on Earth.

In addition, Sarah Palin was then criticized by some of not showing enough interest in the project. The Frontiersman reported that at a public meeting with the Chamber of Commerce, an opponent of the project "accused Wasilla Mayor Sarah Palin of staying quiet about the arena because of her campaign for Lieutenant Governor." "Sports Arena Campaign gets Rolling"http://www.frontiersman.com/... (February 22, 2002).

“AN OPPONENT of the project” (emphasis added)? One person in a public meeting, who apparently holds no position of authority, kvetches? That means less than nothing, so why is Mr. Flein including it? It smells of red herring.

Further, this was a highly public project, approved by the voters, and subject to public bid requirements. As described by the City of Wasilla itself:

The city uses competitive means for the purchase of all goods and services as required by Wasilla Municipal Code 5.08. The city also utilizes contracts and price agreements established by the State of Alaska, the Western States Contracting Alliance and other cooperatives or agencies when it is deemed to be in the best interest of the City. The city believes in open, fair competition and strives to ensure that all vendors have equal opportunity to compete for city business.

The City of Wasilla operates under a decentralized purchasing system. This means purchasing decision up to $5,000 is made independently by the departments in the city (with the exception of Management Information System purchases). When the estimated amount for goods or services is between $5,000 and $9,999, departments are required to obtain three quotes prior to purchase. The departments may utilize the services of the Purchasing/Contracting Officer (PCO) for this process or may do it themselves; however, when this processed is selected, the PCO must sign off on the final product prior to purchasing or contracting.

For purchases beyond $10,000, the city requires all departments to contact the PCO who will utilize the city's bid process according to Wasilla Municipal Code 5.08. The bid process is initiated through either an Invitation to Bid (ITB), utilized when the city knows the specifications for the purchase; or a Request for Proposal (RFP), utilized when the exact specifications or process is unknown.

All well and good. Virtually all municipalities operate on some form of RFP and public or quasi-public bidding process. Nevertheless, the ultimate awarding of bids is still a subjective process. Moreover, regardless of how perfect the Wasilla and Alaska bidding process may be, that process has nothing to do with SBS deciding to give the Palins free building materials.

Ms. Mara Corday. Another sentimental
favorite of mine. I also love idiotic
cowgirl costumes.

http://www.cityofwasilla.com/... Accordingly, the Sports Complex was publicly bid, in accordance with City and state law, and was accounted for in the time and manner all public projects are handled. The Mayor of Wasilla, be it Sarah Palin, or her successor, did not handle the funds, or the materials, for this project. To thus suggest she "embezzled" is as false as it is impossible.

Again, the use of the word “embezzled” is suspicious. The word has a very narrow meaning. I would expect the statement to read “To thus suggest she “embezzled,” received a kickback, discount for goods or services, or any benefit whatsoever from any contractor connected to the building of the Wasilla Sports Complex is as false as it is impossible.” But Mr. Flein does not say that.

The additional claim of "proof" of wrongdoing is the allegation that the Palins purchased building materials from Spenard Builders Supply—and that this company may have provided supplies for the Sports Complex.

This is another red flag for me. “[T]hat this company may have providedsupplies for the Sports Complex” (emphasis supplied), is either careful writing, or just plain sloppy. There is no question that SBS provided materials for both the Palins home and the Sports Complex. The following sentences even suggest (but do not state unequivocally) that SBS was involved in both projects.

Prior to the construction of Lowe’s and Home Depot within the last few years in Wasilla, Spenard Builders Supply was the primary building supply company in Wasilla. It can hardly come as a surprise that it would sell materials to small homeowners or that it would also bid to supply commercial contracts. One would be hard pressed to find a home, cabin or outbuilding in the Mat-Su Valley in which Spenard Builders Supply did not sell at least some of the materials.

Again, this is either careful writing or sloppy writing. If Mr. Flein is being sloppy, he is creating suspicion where he does not need to. But if he is being careful, then Mr. Flein is writing to Governor Palin's supporters, suggesting that Governor Palin’s critics do not even know IF SBS was involved in both projects. This sentence acknowledges the possibility—maybe even the probability that SBS was involved in both projects--but does not say for a fact that SBS provided materials to both the Palin home and to the Sports Complex.

If Mr. Van Flein knows his onions (and I am certain, sure he does), he is trying to create the impression that Governor Palin’s critics do not even know the basic facts of the matter.

The Palins built their Lake Lucille house using Todd as the general contractor. Todd’s family owns a hardware and building supply business in Dillingham. He is no stranger to construction, or to rolling up his sleeves and doing work. 

Ms. Lana Turner. She's happy, because
she also knows someone whose father
owned a hardware store.

The Palin home was built from the ground up on a two acre, lakeside lot. The house has a tax appraised value of $552,000, is two stories, four bedrooms and four baths, and 3,450 square feet. Ask anyone you know in any of the construction trades: will having a dad who owned a hardware store give you the background to build such a house? (The answer will be “no.”) No doubt SOMEBODY besides Todd Palin was involved—if only in drawing up the architectural plans. 

Is it possible that Todd Palin and a few buddies “rolled up their sleeves” and built that house? Sure—but it’s certainly not very probable. I would need to know a lot more information about who else was involved.

The Palins used a combination of personal savings, equity from the sale of their prior home, and conventional bank financing to build the house—like millions of American families. The deeds of trust are recordable public records. Basic journalism and fact checking would confirm this.

No doubt the Palins did this. And “basic journalism and fact checking” will also confirm there is a trust deed, and any liens the Palins may have on their home. However, what “basic journalism and fact checking” cannot confirm is who the subcontractors were or the building permits were acquired on the Palin home, because while Mayor, Sarah Palin blocked an effort to require the filing of building permits. Additionally, all the “basic journalism and fact checking” in world will not confirm that SBS (for example) did not provide the Palins the supplies for their home at a sharp discount. Going back to the Senator Uncle Ted Stevens debacle, the government discovered that the good Senator Uncle paid $160,000 for $410,000 of improvements on a humble mountain cabin only after Mr. Bill Allen, the former chief executive of VECO (an oil services company) rolled over and spilled the beans to the US Attorney.

Unless some similar whistle blower comes through regarding the Palins, or the Palins produce receipts showing they paid 100 cents on the dollar for the supplies for their home, this story will not (and should not) go away.

The Sports Complex was built in 2002. It is now 2009. While the Federal Government has a process to follow, and that process sometimes takes time, we can categorically state that we are not aware of any "federal investigation" that has been "pending" for the last seven years. We are aware of no subpoenas on SBS regarding the Palins. We are aware that the Federal Department of Justice and Federal Bureau of Investigation have been helpful, responsive and diligent in prosecuting the email hacker and in cleaning up Alaska’s corrupt legislators.

Ms. Joi Lansing. You can tell she is 
easy, but not too easy, because only
one strap on her dress is down.

Looks at the dates: 2002 to 2009. What was happening with the Federal Department of Justice at that time? Well, I remember US Attorney Carol Lam for the Southern District of California sent sitting Congressman Randy “Duke” Cunningham to prison, and was fired for incompetence. Then there was US Attorney David Inglesias of New Mexico. His firing resulted in the destruction of the careers of then Senator Pete Domenici and Congresswoman Heather Wilson. In fact, nine honchos at the Department of Justice resigned in disgrace for malfeasance, including Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. I can’t imagine misconduct by Republican mayors of towns less than six thousand population was big focus.

But so what? Whether there is (or is not) a “federal investigation,” that does not answer any questions as to who built and paid for the Palins’ home.

To be blunt—this "story" was alleged during the campaign, evaluated then by national media and deemed meritless. Nothing has changed.

Let me be blunter. A blank assertion that this allegation has been “evaluated” by an (unspecified) “national media” means nothing. In the immortal words of Gene Autry: Show Me the Money. If the Palins paid for all the materials and services that went into building their home, then show me the receipts. Give me the affidavits of the architect who drew up the plans, the electrician who put in the wiring, the plumber who did whatever plumbers do to get the bathroom water to the bathroom and the kitchen water to the kitchen. Show me the receipts that the Palins paid for all those fancy pantsy appliances. And if they didn’t pay for any of that stuff—then who did?

The following is the empty and ridiculous threat of legal action, that I addressed in my previous hissy fit.

To the extent several websites, most notably liberal Alaska blogger Shannyn Moore, are now claiming as "fact" that Governor Palin resigned because she is "under federal investigation" for embezzlement or other criminal wrongdoing, we will be exploring legal options this week to address such defamation. This is to provide notice to Ms. Moore, and those who re-publish the defamation, such as Huffington Post, MSNBC, the New York Times and The Washington Post, that the Palins will not allow them to propagate defamatory material without answering to this in a court of law. The Alaska Constitution protects the right of free speech, while simultaneously holding those "responsible for the abuse of that right." Alaska Constitution Art. I, Sec. 5.http://ltgov.state.ak.us/... These falsehoods abuse the right to free speech; continuing to publish these falsehoods of criminal activity is reckless, done without any regard for the truth, and is actionable. And a moron says what.

Thomas Van Flein, for Governor Sarah Palin

Okay—I made up that last part.

Actionable schmactionable, as they say where I come from. Do I know for a fact the Palins got free stuff, in the form of goods and services for the building of their 2002 home? Of course not. Do I have reasons to be suspicious? You betcha, to coin a phrase.

Ms. Mamie Van Doren. I think she's got
the towel over her head, so you don't
ask why she's wearing heels with her
swimsuit.

What do I want to know?

I mentioned in my last post that I had done some work on my house, right after I bought it. Suppose I was the governor of Alaska (big ups to my best friend (in 1969) and current Alaska resident Tracy who would probably burn in hell before voting for me—but we digress), and some troublemakers were accusing me of getting free goods and services for my home repair. What kind of a statement would I release?

First, I would not attack anyone in the media. The responsibility of the media is to ferret out public corruption, and if I have hold some public office and get free stuff, I have the legal and ethical responsibility to disclose that.

Second, my “statement” would be much simpler and straightforward. For example:

There have been numerous allegations that I have received free or sharply discounted goods and/or services regarding the repair of my home, and that I have failed to disclose those gifts. That is incorrect.

Enclosed with this statement are copies documents showing the following:
1) Who I purchased my home from, and the price I paid.
2) The names of the carpenter, electrician, plumbers, roofers, and tree trimmers I hired, their bills, and their supporting affidavits confirming that they both billed me in full, and I paid their bills.
3) Also included are some of the receipts from the building supply stores where I purchased the materials for my home repair. Unfortunately, I do not have all of the receipts, but I do have affidavits from Home Depot, Color Tile, Standard Paints and Brands, and A Boy Hardware that they have not—and indeed would not—give me any discounts.
4) Next, there are affidavits from the friends of mine who helped me with work on the house, and the extent of work they performed without pay. Each person states they performed the work as a favor to me, out of friendship.
5) Finally, there are copies of all the applicable building permits detailing work done, and where no permit was required, I wrote a brief summary of that particular project.

In conclusion, I want to say that at no time did I receive any benefit in the form of goods, services, special considerations, discounts, kickbacks, or benefits in any way, other than what I have listed in this statement. And a moron says what.

Ta Dah! And we all go on to live rich and happy lives. Almost. I would probably have to answer a whole lot of other very embarrassing questions---like:

“How do you respond to the allegations in the affidavit from your friend Skip that sheetrocking with you was a nightmare, because you don’t know your right from your left?”

“In the affidavit from Steve, he says that when the two of you spray painted your house, you spent about half the time crying, because you kept getting paint in your eyes. Is that true?”

Ms. Joi Lansing. When she is not typing,
she is answering the phone. What a
great secretary!

“The affidavit from your electrician says that he never considered giving you a discount for of your political beliefs, because you have your head up your ass about Chile. Is your head up your ass?”

“The affidavit by your ex-wife says you took more than five years to tile a shower. Why did you need five years to tile one shower?”

“An affidavit from Todd says that the only tools you should be allowed to use are made by Fisher Price. What does he mean by that?”

“Your plumber says that several times he almost walked off the job, because you kept asking him if copper pipes would make your water taste quote 'funny,' but were unable to explain what you meant by the word 'funny.' Is that true?”

“The president of Acme Roofing says that he remembers your house very well, because he’s never even heard of a house having five layers of tar paper covering a rotten shake roof before. He also wonders about the brains of someone who would buy a house in that shape. Do you have any similar concerns about your brains?”

“Joe the Carpenter, who replaced the sill on your house, says that he remembers you, because he has never had to yell ‘Will you get the hell out of here?’ so many times. What kept you from getting the hell out of there?”

“The affidavit from the Color Tile Corporation not only states that they did not give you any special consideration, they considered applying for a restraining order, banning you from their locations, ostensively because your complete inability to make any form of decision drove three employees to file for disability from stress related issues. Did you send 'get well' cards to those employees?”

“Mike says in his affidavit that working with you trimming trees renewed his faith in an omnipotent and loving god, because while you all managed to bend the blade of the chainsaw, neither of you suffered any permanent injury. What impact—if any—did that experience have on your faith?”

Ms. Diana Dors. Don't be messing with
her about who all built her house.

“An affidavit from Judith states that you did extensive stripping of lead paint with a heat gun, because she remembers you saying that you didn’t need to use a safety mask if you quote ‘drank lots of water, to flush the lead out of your system.’ Are you really that stupid?”

“A mortgage broker named Steve says that he is well aware of all the financing you have done with your home, because working with you quote ‘felt like he was Edgar Bergan working with Charlie McCarthy.’ What does he mean by that?”


Maybe it’s just as well I’m not the governor of Alaska.

You Won't Have Sarah Palin's Higher Power to Kick Around Anymore

Ms. Jayne Mansfield. Again, when you're
going to throw a hissy fit and go into
great detail about financing residential
construction, you really have to start 
strong.

This is going to be a very angry note, written by a very cranky guy. When I find myself getting cranky-angry, what helps is to think on people who are gentle cats; the kind of people we (here, I really mean “me”) should try harder to emulate. Lucky for me, my friend Bob is exactly one of those people: he is, by any measure, a good guy. Thinking on Bob helps me to be less angry. 

Now that I am also less cranky, I will say that when the final roll is called up yonder, I will do my level best to ensure my friend Bob (among other accomplishments) is also known for two things. First, “Chicken Bob” which is a delicious way to prepare barbeque chicken (see infra), and “The Bob Rule.” 

I first met Bob when I was a low level flunky at the State Legislature, and Bob was a medium-high level state employee, doing a bunch of testifying or advising or some such. After one particularly trying day of fighting for Truth, Justice, and The Oregon Way (don’t ask), Bob and I were heading home when he turned to me and said “You know what it takes to be a successful politician? Not brains, talent, ambition, savvy, common sense—none of that. To be a successful politician, you have to have only one thing, and that’s absolutely no sense of self-consciousness or embarrassment.” I stopped dead, and thought about every political person I knew or had read about, and realized that Bob had found the one common denominator they all shared: everyone of them were able to say something completely crazy in all good conscience, even if they knew what they were saying was crazy.

That conversation was over twenty years ago, and nothing that has happened since then to put even a dent in The Bob Rule. I am telling you the story of Bob, because the latest twist and shake of the Sarah Palin saga has brought The Bob Rule back to the fore.

By now, certainly everyone reading this is well aware that Alaska’s own Sarah Palin has seen fit to resign as Governor. 

Princess Grace. Say what you want 
about The Princess, but all her public
statements had good grammar and 
correct punctuation.

You are also probably aware of the contradictory and nonsensical nature of her statement “explaining” why she was resigning. If you have not read it, here it is. I urge all of you to read it. At another time, I will go into how appalled I am at the poor punctuation and grammar of seemingly everyone in the Alaska Governor’s office (What--no one owns a copy of Strunk & White?), but suffice to say, this statement raises many more questions than it answers.

So, intrepid people that we are, legions (we are called “Legion,” for we are many) have leaped forward to suggest reasons as to why Governor Palin resigned. For example, my niece the notorious troublemaker suggested that Governor Palin resigned, because Governor Palin felt bad after reading all the terrible things I wrote about her. I wish. 

But apparently, some Bloggers (not me) have really hurt Governor Palin’s feelings. On July 4 2009, Mr. Thomas Van Flein, an attorney representing Sarah Palin, released a statement, threatening legal action against said Bloggers (again, not me. Damn it!). I cannot find the actual statement, so if you have the link, let me know and I will include it. Here is the Associated Press article where I took this quote from Mr. Van Flein’s statement:

"To the extent several websites, most notably liberal Alaska blogger Shannyn Moore, are now claiming as 'fact' that Governor Palin resigned because she is 'under federal investigation' for embezzlement or other criminal wrongdoing, we will be exploring legal options this week to address such defamation . . . This is to provide notice to Ms. Moore, and those who re-publish the defamation, such as Huffington Post, MSNBC, the New York Times and The Washington Post, that the Palins will not allow them to propagate defamatory material without answering to this in a court of law."

Ms. Ava Gardner. After you've been
married to Mickey Rooney, Artie Shaw,
Howard Hughes, AND Frank Sinatra,
people know better than to threaten 
you.

Well, shut my mouth. I have no idea whoShannyn Moore is (besides the fact she seems to be from Homer, AK), but I have seen the allegations that Mr. Van Flein is talking about. I am going to repeat them RIGHT HERE, courtesy of Facebook and Samsara Samizdat. Why? Because manuscripts don’t burn, as they say where I (kind of) come from.

What is it with politicians in Alaska? The Mrs. and Uncle Ted Stevens were able to “remodel” a mountain cabin, by getting $410,000. of work, with only having to pay $160,000. I guess the secret is hiring the right building contractor, which in Senator Stevens’s case was the chief executive of an oil services company that (back in the day) did a whole bunch of government work. If you want to know more about The Ted Stevens Story, you can go here.

But what are the rumours of “embezzlement” and “other criminal wrong doing” targeted at poor Sarah Palin? Well, it involves the family homestead. From the Daily Kos, here is a picture of the two story, four bedroom, four bath, 3,450 sq. foot lakeside shack that the Palins call home, valued at $552,000. All well and good. What’s not so good is that some people are asking where did the house come from. The Official Story is husband Todd Palin built the house with “a few friends [unspecified] who were contractors.” 

The Palin Plaza. Just a little something Todd & the boys threw together one afternoon. Kind of.

What’s getting “re-published” is that at the same time that La Casa Palin was built, just down the road the Wasilla Sports Complex, a $12.5 million public works project, was built by Howdie Inc., a primarily residential contractor owned by one Mr. Howard Nugent. Who is Howard Nugent? Among other things, he’s a financial contributor to Sarah Palin. Many of the army of subcontractors building the Wasilla Sports Complex were also Palin contributors. If you want to see the whole laundry list, here is a link.

One of the bigger subcontractors for the Sports Complex was Spenard Builders Supply (SBS). To be fair, SBS is described as Alaska’s leading supplier of wood, floor, roof, and other building materials. However, SBS is also a sponsor of Todd Palin’s snowmobile racing team, and hired Sarah to act in a statewide television commercial in 2004. In 2002, SBS supplied the materials for both the Sports Complex, and the Palin home.

Ms. Hedy Lamarr. She has nothing to do
with this note. I needed to include her
in my hissy fits on same-sex 
marriages, because she had a boatload
of Reno divorces.

So, what’s the story?

Here’s what gets the Palins (and their attorneys) all excited: the story circulating the “liberal blogosphere” (as opposed to the usual suspects that make up the Unrepresentative Eastern Liberal Media Establishment (the UELME)) is (part one) SBS and the contractors who built the Wasilla Sports Complex are the “buddies” who “helped” Todd Palin build the Palin home, (part two) they built the Palin house in exchange for then Mayor Sarah’s awarding of contracts for building the Wasilla Sports Complex. And (part three) Sarah Palin suddenly decided to resign as Governor not because everything is going great in Alaska (it’s not); nor because Alaska is projecting a $1.3 billion budget gap for fiscal year 2010 (which is 30% of the state’s total budget), and Sarah Palin is not up to the demands of dealing with the fiscal crisis (she’s not); but because she is trying to head off an investigation into who gave the Palins’ their home, and what benefits they received in exchange for the largess. 

The Palin camp’s self-righteous chest thumping centers around allegations that there is a pending “criminal” investigation or a “federal” investigation. For example, in a July 4 2009 article, the Anchorage Daily News quotes Van Flein saying “I can say definitively I am aware of no criminal investigation whatsoever involving Sarah Palin. Zero.” What does that mean? Well, it could mean there is an ethical investigation, which is civil as opposed to criminal. Or it could mean there is an investigation involving the Palin home, as opposed to investigating Sarah Palin personally. Or it could mean there are boatloads of investigations of Sarah Palin—only Van Flein is “not aware” of them. But does Mr. Van Flein’s statement mean that SBS and Howard Nugent did not build and pay for the Palins’ home? Not even vaguely.

Still, the same Anchorage Daily News article goes on to quote Mr. Van Flein saying “[t]he Palins used a combination of personal savings, equity from the sale of their private home, and conventional bank financing to build the house, like millions of American families.” Okay----but did the Palins get a deal, like Uncle Ted, in that they paid in the neighborhood of thirty cents on a dollar for work and materials? Proving that would be easy enough, but apparently Mr. Van Flein’s statement failed to include particulars.

So, ‘splain it to me, Ricky: why is the blogosphere in an uproar?

Ms. Jane Russell. I have to start spicing
it up, because my note is really starting
to lag here.

First, we have Ted Stevens failing to disclose on his ethics statements that he received $410,000. of cabin renovation, but paid only $160,000. Did the Palins receive such a deal? When I bought my fixer-upper house, it needed re-wiring, re-plumbing, a new roof, replacing roughly a third of the sill, and gutting the bathroom. Now, let’s say some conservative gadfly claimed that rumour has it the Democratic National Committee, Americans United for Separation of Church and State, the ACLU, and the First Church of Satan (Reformed) together pooled their funds to rebuild my house—all in an effort to secretly support Samsara Samizdat. Unfortunately, I can show that the roofers, plumbers, electrician, and carpenter were all paid one hundred cents on the dollar by me, and (despite my best efforts) they did not give a rat’s ass about my opinions on anything. There is no reason why the Palins could not do the same.

Second, people not from Alaska may ask why not just go look at the building permits, and see who were the Palins’ contractors? Here’s why not: as Mayor of Wasilla, Sarah Palin blocked an effort to require the filing of building permits, so there is no public record of just who the elves were who built the Palin home.

Not the contractors who helped Todd
Palin build the family homestead.

Next, despite the wide ranging accomplishments and skills attributed to Todd Palin in GOP hagiography, Todd Palin is still a fisherman and a part-time oil worker. While Mr. Palin may truly be “no stranger to construction,” as Mr. Van Flein claims, that’s a far cry from being able to build two story, 3,500 square foot home. Maybe Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney were able to throw together Broadway caliber shows in an Uncle’s barn with costumes left over from the school play—but that was in the movies. A handyman (no matter how handy) cannot build a two story home with the help of “a few buddies.”

Fourth, why is Governor Palin suddenly resigning now? On its face, her statement makes no sense at all. The timing is also strange: the Friday of a three day weekend? Either Sarah Palin truly is erratic and irresponsible, or there is some other reason she is rushing out the door. The sloppy nature of her statement also suggests the timing was rushed, despite Governor Palin’s insistence that “this decision has been in the works for awhile.” Additionally, the statement is especially bitter about what Governor Palin feels are frivolous ethics complaints, strongly implying that those complaints have driven her from office.

Ms. Mamie Van Doren. It only looks like she's playing in the sand. She's actually working on the foundation for a new Governor's mansion. Honest.

Finally, as the article in the Anchorage Daily News reports, rumours about how the Palins' house was built have been around since the house built in 2002. As I said, proving that the Palins did not receive any special “deals” on labour or materials would be easy enough. Why haven’t they done so? Because it is none of our business how they built their house and who paid for it? Sorry--but no. If you hold public office, it most certainly is my business who all is giving you free stuff—whether or not there are any “federal” or “criminal” investigations pending that you are “aware of.”

But getting back to The Bob Rule, that the single most important quality of a successful politician is to have absolutely no sense of self-consciousness or embarrassment, could you hope for a better example that this quote from Governor Palin’s “explanation” for her resignation: 

[I]t may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: “Sit down and shut up”, but that’s the worthless, easy path; that’s a quitter’s way out. And a problem in our country today is apathy. It would be apathetic to just hunker down and “go with the flow”. (All punctuation and grammar in original).

Is it so hard to believe that like Senator Stevens, Sarah Palin honestly feels her public service entitles her to a free house, and that she should be excused from having to admit that she has received such a blessing? I'm just asking here.

In the meantime, New York Times v. Sullivan is still good law, and I fully intend to “re-publish” everything I see fit, regardless if in Mr. Van Flein’s view it is “defamatory,” and I will certainly do my part to “propagate defamatory material.” As for “answering to this in a court of law,” as they say in the mystery stories: Bring it. And don’t stop to pick any flowers.

Ms. Corrine Calvert. You will have to
makeup your own snarky comment 
about Governor Palin for this photo.
I've run out. Sorry.

Chicken Bob

This recipe is simplicity itself. First, make a marinade as follows. I can never remember the exact ratios, but it’s something like this: two part soy sauce and one part vegetable oil, add like half a teaspoon powdered ginger (more if you like it real gingery, less if you don’t want it so gingery). Put the chicken inside a ziplock plastic bag, to maximize marinade contact with chicken.

Now, Bob lets the chicken marinate between 45 minutes to an hour. I like chicken with lots of soy and lots of ginger, so I let it sit overnight. However you do it, discard the marinade, and barbeque the chicken over a medium fire, being careful not to overcook it (unless you like it that way).

Chicken Bob goes especially well with corn on the cob, and pretty much everything else.